Friday, January 9, 2009

very clean credit cards

so yes.
i'm a guy.
i think that's been established already.
being of the aforementioned gender, i have certain policies when it comes to laundering clothing.
and they go like this:
*wash in warm
*dry on medium

if it doesn't come out looking (more or less) like the way it went in, it wasn't meant to be.
simple but effective.
i cant do clothing labels.
i've had stuff shrink to the size of a ken doll. that's fine. wasn't meant t be.
this is not to say i don't own suits and ties and shirts that are dry clean only.
i work at a office. i'm stuck with that S---
but for everything else, there's tide
only tide
that's my mother's fault
i dont think the universe would be ok if i used anything but tide. occasionally she would use cheer, so i allow myself that indiscretion from time to time.

all this is to say that i recently left my wallet and important papers in my pants pocket when it went into the wash
the papers? they are no more
which is a real pisser. i had so much important info on them its not even worth thinking about cause it will only make me more upset.
the credit cards (although canceled because i thought they were stolen and searched pretty frantically for them for the better part of 2 hours) are very very clean.

now i just need to call the companies and have them reinstate them
or whateveritisithattheydo.


creative kerfuffle said...

i learned, the hard way, to check all pockets before washing. aside from the kleenex everyone's washed, i've washed crayons, pens, wallets, action figures, cigarettes, tools (pocket sized of course) and more. i now empty pockets and claim any money i find; i consider it a tip : )

Tova Darling said...

I once washed and dried my driver's license (as I'd been out to a club and had it in my pocket - I look 17 and am always, always carded.) I realized my license was missing a few days later and that I'd washed the jeans it had been in, so I searched all over my house. I finally found it... STUCK to the inside of the dryer. It was ok, but permanantly bent into a curve the exact shape of the inside of the dryer.

Diane said...

I wash/dry the same way... warm/medium... I'm not quite as picky about detergents, though I tend to stick to Purex (probably because it's the cheapest). My mother is still a Tidee (she's tidy, too). I didn't inherit that (or the tidy either).

Oh, but nothing's better than washing and DRYING crayons, baby. Everything stuck together with pretty-colored wax. Oh yeah.

And the last time I cancelled a card and then found it, they told me the cancellation was irreversible and made me wait (weeks) for the new cards. I hate banks.

Jess said...

I got a very clean, unopened pack of cigarettes out of the wash the other day. I wasn't too pleased about that either...though not as important as your important papers...sorry about that chum!

Anonymous said...

I washed and dried Chapstick one time. Everything had nice oil spots on them. Also, last summer I went to the laundro-mat to clean a sleeping bag too big to fit in my washer. I found 20 bucks in the machine. Score! :)

B.E. Earl said...

Hope you have better luck with re-instating your credit cards than I did once upon a time.

I was on vacation and I left my debit card in an ATM by mistake. OK...I was drunk. Anyway, the next day upon not finding it I called the bank to report it missing. They cancelled it, but I still had a credit card from the same bank I could use...right? Wrong. They made a mistake and cancelled my credit card instead. I told them that was the only other means I had for paying for things with my bank card missing, but they couldn't re-instate it over the phone. Problem was I was about 700 miles from the nearest branch.

Thankfully, I went to the bank whose ATM I left my bank card in and they were able to get it out of the machine. Phew...I had tons more booze to buy that week.

ChurchPunkMom said...

washing the wallet? sucks.

so does washing the cell phone. oops.

SweetPeaSurry said...

See this is why women carry handbags, and now there are even handy dandy "man-bags" for those discerning and stylish men.

Pockets are SOOO last season!!!

(Glad ya found ya cards though, that's a pisser)

Michelle said...


It's the only reason i check my pockets these days before washing!!! Sad isn't it!!??

So, yeah i just got into the whole thing of actually separating the whites and darks. Yikes that sounded racist. It isn't and i'm not!!!

Happy Saturday!!!

Vodka Mom said...

and here I thought I was the only dumbass in the world.

J Cosmo Newbery said...

And then there's the small matter of little bits of paper mush stuck to everything...

Lee said...

Isn't it a wonderful feeling when you realize what you have done!

justsomethoughts... said...

CK - money would be a nice find. and it is one of the things that actually comes out cleaner from the wash. nice and crispy.

TD - hey! it's football sunday. (i miight get over the initials at some point. mid-february or so.)
the cards were all in a leather case. so i had to dry the case and air out the cards blah blah blah. not fun.

diane - knew you were a kindred spirit! crayons are VERY not cool.

jess - i have never left a pack of smokes in my pocket. thats prob one of the only things i havent left in my pocket...

sweet cheeks - i would have to say that grease stains piss me off more than anything else. its not like a big yellow splotch on a black pair of jeans. it really subtle. but just enough to make you throw the damned thing out.

B.E. Earl - i'm realy glad you ended up getting the drinks. i was worried there for a moment. a vacation without booze is like....well....a vacation without booze. and either of those would be horrible.

CPM - if i washed my cell phone, i would make holes in every wall in my house with my fists and various hammers and baseball bats.

SPS - i am jealous of women (and men that have the gumption to carry that embarrassing thing around) in that regard. but i cant see carrying around anything that wont fit in my pocket.

michelle - i am racially discriminate as well when it comes to lights and darks. because i dont want my tighty whities being tighty gray-ies. thats just not cool. and its happened too many times.

vodka mom - thanks. from now on i know where to come for a bit of a confidence boost ;)

jcn - that would have been the icing on the cake. but in fact it was just a sad little wet gob of paper.

lee - wonderful in a manner of speaking, perhaps. but not the kind of wonderful i'm looking to replicate anytime soon.